For those of you who may not know, I am pursuing a masters degree in Adult Education. I have learned so much about lifelong learning and the amazing benefits to keeping our minds in a constant state of learning and growing that I decided to start a blog that is specifically designed for that topic. I will be talking about learning opportunities in your community, the benefits of learning, and even how to give something back through offering learning to others. Be sure to visit it!
I think you'll like it ...
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Why do things change?
My husband called a longtime friend of ours last night who lives in North Carolina. We hadn't talked to him or his wife in over a year, but wanted to ask them a question. After the initial "hey how are you" conversation, he shared with my husband that 1 year ago his wife of 30 years walked out on him and their two 14 year old children.
I can't express to you how deeply this affected me. They were such an amazing couple. Totally devoted to each other, their children, and their Lord. When my husband asked what had happened, he said he had no idea. Everything was great, they built a new home and were preparing to move in the following week. He came home from work, her bags were packed and said she was leaving. No explaination, simply walked out and they haven't heard from her since with the exception of the divorce papers that came soon after.
I sat last night wondering what had happened? What went wrong? What makes my marriage different than theirs that I am so happy and committed to it? I finally came to this conclusion. COMMITTMENT, AND FRIENDSHIP. First and foremost, my husband and I are both EQUALLY committed to our relationship and constantly working to keep it healthy and working. Second, we are each other's best friends. When something goes wrong, he is the one I call to talk to. When something great happens, he is the first one I want to share it with. When I get a funny email, he is the first one I forward it to.
I guess my ramblings for the day are this. If you want to have and keep a healthy marriage ... DON'T EVER LET YOUR GUARD DOWN. You need to be working on your relationship ALL THE TIME. Never take your spouse, your family or your relationship with them for granted. Or, much too easily it could end up just like our friends in NC.
I can't express to you how deeply this affected me. They were such an amazing couple. Totally devoted to each other, their children, and their Lord. When my husband asked what had happened, he said he had no idea. Everything was great, they built a new home and were preparing to move in the following week. He came home from work, her bags were packed and said she was leaving. No explaination, simply walked out and they haven't heard from her since with the exception of the divorce papers that came soon after.
I sat last night wondering what had happened? What went wrong? What makes my marriage different than theirs that I am so happy and committed to it? I finally came to this conclusion. COMMITTMENT, AND FRIENDSHIP. First and foremost, my husband and I are both EQUALLY committed to our relationship and constantly working to keep it healthy and working. Second, we are each other's best friends. When something goes wrong, he is the one I call to talk to. When something great happens, he is the first one I want to share it with. When I get a funny email, he is the first one I forward it to.
I guess my ramblings for the day are this. If you want to have and keep a healthy marriage ... DON'T EVER LET YOUR GUARD DOWN. You need to be working on your relationship ALL THE TIME. Never take your spouse, your family or your relationship with them for granted. Or, much too easily it could end up just like our friends in NC.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Self Imposed Stress!
I like to think that I am a pretty stress free person. I don't get too worked up about things, I'm positive and my glass is almost always half-full. However ... recently I learned that I do get stressed, and it was completely SELF IMPOSED!
I have gone back to college to complete my Bachelors degree and I am taking 9 hours. This in and of itself is not a problem, and I seemed to be able to keep up with the work load with very little stress. Then it happened ... MID TERM WEEK! One of my classes required a 3 page research paper for the mid-term, one was just a weekly quiz, and one was a Mid-term exam. No problem right? WRONG! I began to get very nervous about the exam. I had done well on all the quizzes up to this point, but just the word EXAM seemed to turn my usually stress free self into a quivering, fearful person that I had never met before.
This really surprised me because I have been in college before and it never had this effect on me then. Unfortunately no matter what I did I couldn't seem to shake it. I studied all the time, memorized, and studied some more. I even saved my notes onto my iPod so I could study when I didn't have my notes with me! I was OBSESSED with this exam. No matter how much I studied I did not feel I was prepared and my stress level simply continued to go up!
The exam was on Friday evening at 6 pm, so I met my husband for a quick bite to eat at 4:30 and was so nervous I could barely eat. Just before I left he said to me "just relax, and do your best." I went to the exam, completed it, and even got the answers before I left so I would know exactly what my score was and guess what ... I got a B!
Now, here is the point to this rambling blog post ... WORRY AND STRESS DON'T DO ANYTHING BUT MAKE YOU FEEL SICK! I once heard a statistic that 90% of the things we worry and stress about don't even come to pass! Can you imagine? The next time you get stressed over a situation, you need to ask yourself a few questions: 1. Can I change the outcome of this in any way? If the answer is NO, just let it go and move on! 2. If the answer was YES, you need to do what you physically can to make a difference (in my case study) and then be willing to let the chips fall as they will!
I have gone back to college to complete my Bachelors degree and I am taking 9 hours. This in and of itself is not a problem, and I seemed to be able to keep up with the work load with very little stress. Then it happened ... MID TERM WEEK! One of my classes required a 3 page research paper for the mid-term, one was just a weekly quiz, and one was a Mid-term exam. No problem right? WRONG! I began to get very nervous about the exam. I had done well on all the quizzes up to this point, but just the word EXAM seemed to turn my usually stress free self into a quivering, fearful person that I had never met before.
This really surprised me because I have been in college before and it never had this effect on me then. Unfortunately no matter what I did I couldn't seem to shake it. I studied all the time, memorized, and studied some more. I even saved my notes onto my iPod so I could study when I didn't have my notes with me! I was OBSESSED with this exam. No matter how much I studied I did not feel I was prepared and my stress level simply continued to go up!
The exam was on Friday evening at 6 pm, so I met my husband for a quick bite to eat at 4:30 and was so nervous I could barely eat. Just before I left he said to me "just relax, and do your best." I went to the exam, completed it, and even got the answers before I left so I would know exactly what my score was and guess what ... I got a B!
Now, here is the point to this rambling blog post ... WORRY AND STRESS DON'T DO ANYTHING BUT MAKE YOU FEEL SICK! I once heard a statistic that 90% of the things we worry and stress about don't even come to pass! Can you imagine? The next time you get stressed over a situation, you need to ask yourself a few questions: 1. Can I change the outcome of this in any way? If the answer is NO, just let it go and move on! 2. If the answer was YES, you need to do what you physically can to make a difference (in my case study) and then be willing to let the chips fall as they will!
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